I remain in awe sometimes with the things I experience. My time spent with spirit never fails to surprise me. And I love that because it means there's always something new. Some shift or adaptation that enables me to continue growing with understanding and wonder.
Once, I was really trying to connect on a deeper level with one of the animal spirits I work with. And instead, they decided there was something else I needed to see. Up to that point, this particular spirit had prepared a way for me to connect with my ancestors. Specifically to the ones I needed to connect with in that moment.
This particular time, it decided to take me away from what has become my "safe space," whatever that means when you enter the spiritual realms. We flew over oceans and seas. And I found myself surrounded by lush beautiful green grasses covering hills and mountains. The scents were fresh and so very clean. And there was music. Strange yet familiar music.
The animal flew ahead of me a little bit and I followed wondering what it was going to reveal about itself. What I found instead were people. Playing these instruments, some "normal" while others being a little weird and fascinating. And this woman danced up to me with a tambourine in hand. Long skirt flowing with a long billowy sleeve shirt. Long wild curly hair. Bright wise eyes. And with a husky voice, she said to me, "Welcome home."
In an instant, I knew where I was. I had been brought to more ancestors and we were in the hills of Sicily. The woman raised her arms and clapped her tambourine twice. It was a cue and the other people finished off the music and settled onto the ground. She told me to come sit with her and as I did she asked, "Well it's about time, so what brings you to see us?" I didn't have any questions for her. I wasn't prepared to meet her. So I pointed at the animal spirit and sheepishly said, "I don't really know. They brought me to you. I was trying to find out more about them"
She laughed and shook her head. She looked at the animal spirit and laughed again. "Yeah, they can be a little sly at times." "Oh I know," I retorted. And I told her a story about what a different animal spirit had done to me. The entire camp erupted in laughter at that story (it'll be posted at some point). But that's when I realized they were all listening in. This wasn't just about meeting one ancestor. This was meeting a clan.
"Well," she continued, "you're here now. So is there anything you would like to know from us?" I thought for a second and it dawned on me. These were the first native Sicilian ancestors I had met. "Why haven't I met any of you before this?"
She settled back and she pulled out a pipe. She packed it and lit it with a flourish of her hand. The smoke was sweet, light, and fragrant. Not like the musky smell of tobacco. (Tangent: as I was typing this I realized I didn't know what she was smoking. These were pre-Roman Sicilians, so long before tobacco was ever brought to Europe. I might have to go visit them again and get the recipe...it might help me finish clearing off my nicotine addiction. End Tangent)
She took a couple of puffs of the pipe and I watched her just gaze lovingly over the landscape. I followed her gaze and just marveled at the sheer beauty displayed before me. "This is our home. We tend to it and keep the energy moving and flowing. It has seen terrible events, but its majesty remains unbroken. We don't leave because we are needed here. If you want to learn from us you have to come to us," she finished. (Tangent 2: Time is weird when you go into spiritual realms. These ancestors are again Pre-Roman so BC era before even Vesuvius destroyed Pompeii on the mainland. But they are still there today. Time is weird and you learn to accept that as one of a few true constants.)
She laughed a bit again. "We can't always come to you just because you want an answer. Take your friend there for example," and she gestures at the animal spirit. "That little one has so much power that you have not tapped into yet. But it's not because you're not ready or because you're asking the wrong questions. It's because that one's power requires you to step out of a comfort zone. You will have to pass over boundaries to really understand and harness that power. But you would have never realized that had they not brought you to us. There's a comfort you have built and you will have to find out what it is yourself and dismantle it. You may end up learning their power before then (which I did a few weeks later) but it will still confuse you until you can free yourself."
The words cut a bit but I knew they weren't said harshly or patronizingly. They were said with the love of a grandmother giving life advice to their grandchild. She stood up then and stretched a bit before retrieving her tambourine. A couple of quick strikes and the entire clan began their music again. And it echoed across the hills. I danced along with them for a while before finally coming back to my own home. I left them there and still in the hills they sing.
And I have taken her advice and step by step I find more ways to get out of my own way. That animal spirit is much less confusing now and I’m growing a deeper rapport with it every time we meet.
I took some time after to research Sicilian instruments and I did find the instruments I saw. One was the pernacchiatore or cupa cupa, a friction drum. And another was a jaw harp called the marranzanu. On their own, they make some pretty weird sounds but when they come together along with the flutes, hand drums, tambourines, and other "normal" instruments it all sounds pretty amazing. At least from what I heard from the clan compared to the YouTube videos I found later while researching the individual instruments.
And as one final note. If you ever have doubts about your own spiritual experiences, if you have ever come out of an encounter with spirits and have to research what you were shown....that should be a pretty good indicator that you didn't just make it up. I've gotten to a point where I live for those moments.
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